Another Rite Of Passage or Just Glad To Be Alive

"TRYING TO STEAL A MINUTE
FROM A STINGY HANDS OF TIME
AND I’M TRYIN TO GET TO HEAVEN
BEFORE THEY HANG OUT THE CLOSIN SIGN
WORLD BLOWN PAST ME
AND WHAT HAVE I GOT TO SHOW
I’M JUST TRYIN TO STEAL A MINUTE
BEFORE IT’S TIME TO GO"

(Randall Bramblett from The Bright Spots)

Today's Chautauqua  concerns a recent health scare, another rite of passage, and a renewed sense of relief and appreciation of this gift we call life - all wrapped up together.  Without going into the unpleasant details, recently I have been having much pain and discomfort in my gut and it brought me to finally do something about it (I know, something about men not stopping to ask for directions yada, yada...).  Which led me to my most recent rite of passage.  I call my Blog, The Other Side of This Life because I am, and one of these rites of passage for anyone over 50 is the dreaded (for very good reason!) Colonoscopy.

Anyone who has been through this awful experience understands.  Those who have not, will eventually.
I'm not going to talk about this, but rather some feelings that led up to it.


As it turns out, I come from a long line of hypochondriacs on my fathers side (as my wife will remind me - often). So as my abdominal pain and discomfort intensified and I continued to ignore it, I knew something wasn't right and decided to do some research online.


Anyone who has ever done this, you know, go online for medical information, knows it took me about 30 seconds to diagnose myself with advanced stage colon cancer with less than 5 years to live.  Don't laugh, you've done that too I'm sure :-).

I'm not making light of this serious situation that so many people face, I'm simply telling my story.  As I pondered my possible early demise what I was really thinking of was my family: have I taken care of them if I can't be there? Emotionally, mentally, financially?  Are my 'ducks lined up' so they are?  What will they remember about me? Will there be tears of sorrow or a mixture of tears of joy as well? Was I a good dad? A good husband? Friend? Brother? Son?

The only one of these questions I can answer is the financial one - the only one that doesn't rely on what someone else thinks. I think that, yes, if I were to die of some disease or accident, my family would be taken care of.  The good news is, after my test, whatever will ultimately kill me, it's not likely to be colon cancer.

Which leads me to the real reason I'm writing this today. I have been thinking quite a bit about some people in my life that are going through some medical challenges that are indeed threatening their very lives.  One of them is my uncle, and the other two are friends and colleagues I work with at Wiley.  I am amazed, strengthened, and humbled by their courage and determination to beat these things.  All three couldn't be more different in their personalities, demeanor, or careers.  They have families, bills, demanding social and civic responsibilities, yet the one thing they all have in common is their sheer love and zeal for life and mostly, the intense and burning desire to live.  I think the statement that captures this best is from my friend Liz who has just kicked cancer's ass:

"I am just glad to be alive so I will take the burdens that come with that gift."

So the next time I'm getting ready to complain about my arthritis, or lower back pain, or work, money or family problems, I'm going to try (try I tell you!) to remember Liz' words.

As always, Peace, Love, and Great Music!